Me: Jers, whenever you leave your mug on the ledge, you know a lizard enters your mug.
Jeroen: Cute no?
As rodent-phobes, I thought Jeroen would get grossed out, take the mug to the kitchen and wash it. But at 11 PM, there was no way he was getting out of bed.
Jeroen: Dear, could you please bring the mug to the kitchen?
Me: No, I’m tired.
Jeroen: I got your water kanina.
Me: I bought your shampoo.
No one moved.
Ben, the intruder, is sleeping on our bed again. At midnight, Markus comes in looking for the charger for his game.
Jeroen: Markus, can you please sleep na.
Markus: I need my charger.
Me: Jer, just turn on the light so he can find it.
(Puts on light.)
Markus: Daddy, cockroach!!
Jeroen: Where? Wha? Whu?? (panic. gets up. PAK! PAK! PAK!)
Jeroen kills the cockroach with the rage of a terrorist.
Ben: Daddy, why did you have to use my Crocs??!!
Jeroen: Because it’s the first thing I saw!
Ben: (upset) Why do you always use my Crocs to kill cockroach??
Me: (looks up to see cockroach juice on the wall. deadma. sleep, spare me. please.)